Locker room talk (I used the same language used by the Rep nominee, you've been warned)
I apologize immediately for the crude language you're about to read. I'd censor it, but I think people need to be confronted with the reality of what is being said. Besides, if this vocabulary is good enough for the Republican Presidential Nominee, I guess it's appropriate to quote. Now that I've got my disclaimer out of the way, here we go.
Let me tell you what happened this past Friday. The battery in my van died. After asking a very nice person to jump start my vehicle, I drove to the nearest auto store. If you're a woman, you already know what happened next. It took me a solid 20 minutes to convince the man at the store that I needed a new battery. He was very nice as he condescendingly told me that my battery couldn't be dead. It must be blah blah blah. Twenty Minutes. My kids were in the car, I continued to be friendly and polite as I repeatedly told the man that I did indeed need a new battery, and the reason his little machine wouldn't work was because my battery was that far gone. I almost went to the Golden Ticket Girl response: "My husband told me to get a new battery, so that's what I have to do." But I am so tired of having to pull the husband card every time I have to deal with my car. I couldn't stomach the words this time, so it took twice as long to get a battery for my van. Once he agreed that I actually did need a new battery, we went to look at the inventory on the computer. Just as I mentally prepared myself for the argument over why I didn't need the most expensive battery for my 10 year van with nearly 200,000 miles, I was relieved to see they were out of the expensive battery. Then we spent another 15 minutes actually doing the transaction because the man didn't know how to use the computer system for a sale. But I'm just a girl that doesn't know a dead battery from a flat tire so what do I know? It's frustrating to be treated as inferior because I'm a woman.
And what news do I have thrust in my face for the past few days whenever I try to keep up with what's going on in our world? I get to hear over and and over again how Donald Trump, the Republican nominee for President of the United States, was recorded making "crude and sexist" remarks; locker room chit chat not meant for women's ears. Then I get to hear how all the Republicans think his remarks are either inappropriate, crude, not a true representation of who Trump is today, etc.
Because I have absolutely no experience of what goes on in a men's locker room, I asked my husband. He's been in the military for over 20 years. Military guys are known for their vulgarity. I asked if he'd ever heard other men talking about grabbing women by their pussy or kissing them without permission because they want to. Is it really common for men to brag about sexual assault? Because that's what this is. This is a man bragging about kissing and grabbing women in their, as he calls them, pussies because he can. According to Trump, the women won't even do anything about it because he's "a star". And do you know, my husband has never heard those conversations. I'm not talking about the breaking down of a woman's worth by the length of her legs, the size of her tits, or her fuckability. I get that. I know it happens frequently. I'm talking about the cavalier attitude of pushing yourself on a woman without permission. That's NOT what every man does or says.
Not that a woman's desire has anything to do with this man's actions, but let's just cover it anyway. Does any man really think a woman wants a man to just walk up and kiss her because he deems her desirable? That a women enjoys a man grabbing her in her most private and sensitive area because he wants to? Perhaps some people will be surprised to find out that women aren't going about their days secretly hoping some famous man will walk up and grab her in her genitals.
But let's be real. This was never about what any woman wanted. This is about what a man wanted. Trump is a toddler. He sees something he wants so he takes it. He feels entitled to it. Why else would a person feel free to act in that manner and brag about it? This recording doesn't merely record a man making crude and sexist remarks eleven years ago. This is a recording of a man describing himself physically pushing himself on women because he feels he deserves to do so.
And what I truly don't get is why everyone is making excuses for him. If some man walked up to me, kissed me and grabbed me, every person I know would be horrified for and with me. If some man walked up to my 10 year old daughter and did the same thing, I can't imagine the response. This eleven year old recording and the embarrassingly said "apology" for any offense he might have caused says that it's okay for a man to take what he wants from a woman because he is entitled. She is less. His wants trump hers.
This is the point where some people will say that I'm blowing this out of proportion. And to a man, I would say he should imagine another man walking up to his wife, daughter, or mother, and kissing her and groping her in front of you. Is that okay? If you're a woman, imagine that happens to you. Are you okay with these actions? Or would you feel violated? Because I'd press charges.
Up to now, I could somewhat respect people and their choice to choose Trump over Hillary. But not now. Do not tell me why Trump is better. Do not tell me why a man that has systematically marginalized groups of people throughout his campaign is better than Hillary Clinton. Do not tell me why you think it's okay and better to vote for a person for President of the United States of America that has acted and bragged about such actions. It's NOT OKAY to kiss and grab women without their permission. It's 2016! I shouldn't have to say this! But in the year of rapists getting a slap on the wrist as to avoid hurting their future and the presidential nominee boasting about using his position to get what he wants (and again, we're supposed to trust him with the power of the presidency?), this has to be said. It's not okay. Hear it again. this is not mere locker room talk, and it is not okay.
For the sake of our friendship, if you're going to vote for Trump, don't talk to me about it. If you think what was said and done is okay and normal, then your opinion of men's behavior and a woman's worth is entirely too low.
Finally, I am in no way saying I prefer Clinton as a choice. I find her equally repulsive, although I don't seem to have the viscerally repulsive response for her that Trump can inspire. And really, the Trump people need to start dealing with the reality of a Clinton presidency now. When the Republican party let a man like Trump get the nominee, you lost the election then. Now we're just going through the motions. The best you can hope for is a Republican Congress to bring some balance.
And now I'm done. I wish I could say that I feel better and expect to reach people, but I don't. After all, I'm just a woman writing out her obviously emotional thoughts. I must be bleeding from my whatever.
Let me tell you what happened this past Friday. The battery in my van died. After asking a very nice person to jump start my vehicle, I drove to the nearest auto store. If you're a woman, you already know what happened next. It took me a solid 20 minutes to convince the man at the store that I needed a new battery. He was very nice as he condescendingly told me that my battery couldn't be dead. It must be blah blah blah. Twenty Minutes. My kids were in the car, I continued to be friendly and polite as I repeatedly told the man that I did indeed need a new battery, and the reason his little machine wouldn't work was because my battery was that far gone. I almost went to the Golden Ticket Girl response: "My husband told me to get a new battery, so that's what I have to do." But I am so tired of having to pull the husband card every time I have to deal with my car. I couldn't stomach the words this time, so it took twice as long to get a battery for my van. Once he agreed that I actually did need a new battery, we went to look at the inventory on the computer. Just as I mentally prepared myself for the argument over why I didn't need the most expensive battery for my 10 year van with nearly 200,000 miles, I was relieved to see they were out of the expensive battery. Then we spent another 15 minutes actually doing the transaction because the man didn't know how to use the computer system for a sale. But I'm just a girl that doesn't know a dead battery from a flat tire so what do I know? It's frustrating to be treated as inferior because I'm a woman.
And what news do I have thrust in my face for the past few days whenever I try to keep up with what's going on in our world? I get to hear over and and over again how Donald Trump, the Republican nominee for President of the United States, was recorded making "crude and sexist" remarks; locker room chit chat not meant for women's ears. Then I get to hear how all the Republicans think his remarks are either inappropriate, crude, not a true representation of who Trump is today, etc.
Because I have absolutely no experience of what goes on in a men's locker room, I asked my husband. He's been in the military for over 20 years. Military guys are known for their vulgarity. I asked if he'd ever heard other men talking about grabbing women by their pussy or kissing them without permission because they want to. Is it really common for men to brag about sexual assault? Because that's what this is. This is a man bragging about kissing and grabbing women in their, as he calls them, pussies because he can. According to Trump, the women won't even do anything about it because he's "a star". And do you know, my husband has never heard those conversations. I'm not talking about the breaking down of a woman's worth by the length of her legs, the size of her tits, or her fuckability. I get that. I know it happens frequently. I'm talking about the cavalier attitude of pushing yourself on a woman without permission. That's NOT what every man does or says.
Not that a woman's desire has anything to do with this man's actions, but let's just cover it anyway. Does any man really think a woman wants a man to just walk up and kiss her because he deems her desirable? That a women enjoys a man grabbing her in her most private and sensitive area because he wants to? Perhaps some people will be surprised to find out that women aren't going about their days secretly hoping some famous man will walk up and grab her in her genitals.
But let's be real. This was never about what any woman wanted. This is about what a man wanted. Trump is a toddler. He sees something he wants so he takes it. He feels entitled to it. Why else would a person feel free to act in that manner and brag about it? This recording doesn't merely record a man making crude and sexist remarks eleven years ago. This is a recording of a man describing himself physically pushing himself on women because he feels he deserves to do so.
And what I truly don't get is why everyone is making excuses for him. If some man walked up to me, kissed me and grabbed me, every person I know would be horrified for and with me. If some man walked up to my 10 year old daughter and did the same thing, I can't imagine the response. This eleven year old recording and the embarrassingly said "apology" for any offense he might have caused says that it's okay for a man to take what he wants from a woman because he is entitled. She is less. His wants trump hers.
This is the point where some people will say that I'm blowing this out of proportion. And to a man, I would say he should imagine another man walking up to his wife, daughter, or mother, and kissing her and groping her in front of you. Is that okay? If you're a woman, imagine that happens to you. Are you okay with these actions? Or would you feel violated? Because I'd press charges.
Up to now, I could somewhat respect people and their choice to choose Trump over Hillary. But not now. Do not tell me why Trump is better. Do not tell me why a man that has systematically marginalized groups of people throughout his campaign is better than Hillary Clinton. Do not tell me why you think it's okay and better to vote for a person for President of the United States of America that has acted and bragged about such actions. It's NOT OKAY to kiss and grab women without their permission. It's 2016! I shouldn't have to say this! But in the year of rapists getting a slap on the wrist as to avoid hurting their future and the presidential nominee boasting about using his position to get what he wants (and again, we're supposed to trust him with the power of the presidency?), this has to be said. It's not okay. Hear it again. this is not mere locker room talk, and it is not okay.
For the sake of our friendship, if you're going to vote for Trump, don't talk to me about it. If you think what was said and done is okay and normal, then your opinion of men's behavior and a woman's worth is entirely too low.
Finally, I am in no way saying I prefer Clinton as a choice. I find her equally repulsive, although I don't seem to have the viscerally repulsive response for her that Trump can inspire. And really, the Trump people need to start dealing with the reality of a Clinton presidency now. When the Republican party let a man like Trump get the nominee, you lost the election then. Now we're just going through the motions. The best you can hope for is a Republican Congress to bring some balance.
And now I'm done. I wish I could say that I feel better and expect to reach people, but I don't. After all, I'm just a woman writing out her obviously emotional thoughts. I must be bleeding from my whatever.
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