I might have taught my kids some bad theology. Or maybe not. It's unclear at the moment.
Okay friends. So I just finished writing up a delightful little thing about our past week, but we all know how the week went. Our lives came to a screeching halt, and we've tried to keep ourselves busy until this massive and slow as ketchup coming out of a Heinz bottle storm did its thing. You all get it. I don't have to rehash it. We are all so over Florence.
Instead, I'll tell you about this other thing that happened! First, I need to explain something to you about myself. When I'm thinking through an issue, I have to look at it from every possible angle. I will read a position on said issue and internally argue against every point I read. Then I'll read something else coming from the opposite angle and argue every point they make. I will argue all the points in my head and sometimes out loud until I either get to a point that I cannot refute OR I realize there's no way to definitively know the answer. At that point, I'm okay with making a choice and holding onto that belief loosely, knowing that intelligent people might come down on another side, and that's okay. Also, I am a passionate and persuasive debater.
So. For the past few months, I've been thinking through women's roles in the church, and asking what does Biblical womanhood even mean. I've grown up and lived with the conservative side of this issue my entire life. I can give you chapter and verse for all the "women should not speak in church", "I do not allow a woman to have authority over a man," "great pain in childbirth...", "submit...". Instead, I've been looking at the other side of things because honestly, the traditional view I have always lived with just doesn't seem to fit. It's full of holes and practical exceptions when it suits certain purposes. So much of it is semantics as it's practiced in churches.
But I don't know where I land yet on this. Unfortunately, as I said earlier, the only way for me to really come to a conclusion is to work my way through every argument. This means I've been reading various interpretations of the aforementioned verses. It also means my kids have been listening to me talk through all these things. Then this happened a few days ago...
Ahem. This is the moment every Baptist ancestor I have simultaneously turned over in his/her grave. Jon looked at me. We had a silent conversation that went like this:
All of my discussion and quips about patriarchy actually went into their little heads, and now I have to hurry up and figure out what I really believe so I can intelligently discuss it with them in a better way. In college, I did my senior seminar paper on women in ministry, and honestly, I wish I could go back in time and do it all over again. I wasn't ready to be more open minded and look beyond the commentary provided by ancient white men. Not that older white men don't have a lot of offer, but seriously. If I learned anything from my Christian Studies degree track, it's that everyone comes at life with a set of presuppositions, and I've been reading from a whole lot of men that generally wear the exact same prescription of rose colored glasses. I'm not even sure there was much for me to read 20 years ago on the subject, and if it there was, I certainly would not have found it in my Southern Baptist school's library.
I really believe that God can handle every single question I throw at Him. I don't think this particular issue is as cut and dry as I was led to believe, but I'm also not ready throw the metaphorical baby out with the bathwater on this issue either. Obviously there are some verses that need to be dealt with, and I want to deal with them appropriately. I don't get to come at the WORD of GOD and decide that a certain passage makes me uncomfortable so I'll just say it's cultural for the time and not prescriptive. Maybe a certain passage really was cultural. Maybe it's a little more prescriptive than I'd like to admit. I don't know.
And that's where I'm at. I don't know, and I haven't looked at it enough to be okay with I don't know. If I teach my kids anything, I want them to know that it's okay to question and search for answers. Maybe we'll do all kinds of research and prayer and determine we had the right idea to start with. How wonderful! Then we can better articulate why we believe what we believe. Maybe we'll study it more deeply and realize we had a few things wrong. How wonderful! We can better reflect Jesus to the world. I see no downside. It's a win/win.
And that's it I suppose. I might have taught my children bad theology, or I might have set them on a straighter path from an earlier age. In any case, I mostly hope they learn to study for themselves instead of trusting what others tell them without question.
Until next time...
Instead, I'll tell you about this other thing that happened! First, I need to explain something to you about myself. When I'm thinking through an issue, I have to look at it from every possible angle. I will read a position on said issue and internally argue against every point I read. Then I'll read something else coming from the opposite angle and argue every point they make. I will argue all the points in my head and sometimes out loud until I either get to a point that I cannot refute OR I realize there's no way to definitively know the answer. At that point, I'm okay with making a choice and holding onto that belief loosely, knowing that intelligent people might come down on another side, and that's okay. Also, I am a passionate and persuasive debater.
So. For the past few months, I've been thinking through women's roles in the church, and asking what does Biblical womanhood even mean. I've grown up and lived with the conservative side of this issue my entire life. I can give you chapter and verse for all the "women should not speak in church", "I do not allow a woman to have authority over a man," "great pain in childbirth...", "submit...". Instead, I've been looking at the other side of things because honestly, the traditional view I have always lived with just doesn't seem to fit. It's full of holes and practical exceptions when it suits certain purposes. So much of it is semantics as it's practiced in churches.
But I don't know where I land yet on this. Unfortunately, as I said earlier, the only way for me to really come to a conclusion is to work my way through every argument. This means I've been reading various interpretations of the aforementioned verses. It also means my kids have been listening to me talk through all these things. Then this happened a few days ago...
Tommy: I don't know why women can't be pastors. What's the big deal if a woman is a pastor or whatever.
Charlotte: Yeah! Why is it a big deal for women to be pastors? They should be able to do the same thing as men!
Ahem. This is the moment every Baptist ancestor I have simultaneously turned over in his/her grave. Jon looked at me. We had a silent conversation that went like this:
Jon: Mindy. This is your fault.
Me: Yeah, I know. Sorry! Maybe? I'm not sure if I'm sorry yet. I'm still working through it.
All of my discussion and quips about patriarchy actually went into their little heads, and now I have to hurry up and figure out what I really believe so I can intelligently discuss it with them in a better way. In college, I did my senior seminar paper on women in ministry, and honestly, I wish I could go back in time and do it all over again. I wasn't ready to be more open minded and look beyond the commentary provided by ancient white men. Not that older white men don't have a lot of offer, but seriously. If I learned anything from my Christian Studies degree track, it's that everyone comes at life with a set of presuppositions, and I've been reading from a whole lot of men that generally wear the exact same prescription of rose colored glasses. I'm not even sure there was much for me to read 20 years ago on the subject, and if it there was, I certainly would not have found it in my Southern Baptist school's library.
I really believe that God can handle every single question I throw at Him. I don't think this particular issue is as cut and dry as I was led to believe, but I'm also not ready throw the metaphorical baby out with the bathwater on this issue either. Obviously there are some verses that need to be dealt with, and I want to deal with them appropriately. I don't get to come at the WORD of GOD and decide that a certain passage makes me uncomfortable so I'll just say it's cultural for the time and not prescriptive. Maybe a certain passage really was cultural. Maybe it's a little more prescriptive than I'd like to admit. I don't know.
And that's where I'm at. I don't know, and I haven't looked at it enough to be okay with I don't know. If I teach my kids anything, I want them to know that it's okay to question and search for answers. Maybe we'll do all kinds of research and prayer and determine we had the right idea to start with. How wonderful! Then we can better articulate why we believe what we believe. Maybe we'll study it more deeply and realize we had a few things wrong. How wonderful! We can better reflect Jesus to the world. I see no downside. It's a win/win.
And that's it I suppose. I might have taught my children bad theology, or I might have set them on a straighter path from an earlier age. In any case, I mostly hope they learn to study for themselves instead of trusting what others tell them without question.
Until next time...
Here's a happy family picture as we wait our Hurricane Florence in downtown Greenville, SC. Look at us cherishing.
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